Counting One Thousand Gifts

One of the books that most impacted me last year was One Thousand Gifts by Ann Voskamp. She has an incredible way of putting words together that lift your spirit and point you straight to our Savior.

Last year I was struggling through the journey of God’s calling to Cambodia and all of the changes it meant. I am definitely a girl who loves routine and the comfortable, so moving around the world to a culture I don’t understand and a language I don’t yet know was incredibly intimidating. I also was having a hard time with the idea of leaving the home office and the family I have found here. I hate goodbyes! I read the book in the midst of all of that, and God used the concept of thankfulness to really help me shift my focus back to Him. At first, any time I would encounter a tough situation I would stop and think about 3 or 4 things that I was thankful for in the midst of all that was going on. Not just general things, but specific parts of that situation that I could turn into a act of gratitude. I was challenged to make it a daily practice of writing down the gifts. As I started to make this a daily habit, I began to see more and more gifts that I had never noticed before. Sometimes I would begrudging write down something that didn’t seem like a gift at all at the moment, asking God to change my heart and see with a different perspective. And He often answered that prayer! By writing down and keeping track of the gifts, I have now an amazing monument of God’s faithfulness through the last three months.

Last week I reached one thousand gifts! I'm not done though because thankfulness is a daily, lifetime task. There are days when I struggle to find the gifts and other days when I can’t write fast enough all the big and little blessings. When thankfulness becomes a habit, God replaces fear with peace and joy that overflows.

Philippians 4:6-7 Do not be anxious about anything but in everything, by prayer and petition, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. 

Here are a few of my gifts. Don't worry, I won't list all 1,000! As you can see, there is a wide range- some big and some little! 

1. Hymns in the wee hours

14. Perfect weather for time on the swing

30. Overhearing funny conversations in the hallway

44. A gift of money exactly when I needed that encouragement

78. Coffee/hot chocolate combo

92. Elohim- the God who created me just as I am

129. Learning a new Cambodian word

200. Fundraising is not about me

236. Working traffic lights

254. A Nebraska win at the last second

358. Sunday school laughter

362. A sermon in English & Khmer

433. Round after round of Spoons at Thanksgiving

463. The colors of a Nebraska sunrise

556. The brief moments just to chat

581. A short wait at the post office

627. Sweet hugs goodbye

661. A coffee cup waiting for me

723. Snowflakes falling, swirling, through the morning

805. Stories of God's faithfulness

877. Grace to switch plans

933. The people who said thank you

948. Sitting outside at Starbucks in January

993. How the foggy mist makes it feel peaceful

1000. Counting gifts and the joy that comes from Thanksgiving!

One Another Mission- Humility

1 Peter 5:5b-7 All of you, clothe yourselves with humility toward one another, because, “God opposes the proud but gives grace to the humble”. Humble yourselves, therefore, under God’s mighty hand, that he may lift you up in due time. Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you.

Comparing ourselves to others is such an easy thing to do, right? We look at someone else and find that they are “above” us in some way, whether it is in education, intellect, influence, fashion or possessions. Or, we go the other way and find that we are superior in some way. This can lead to being intimidated, judging someone falsely, acting in ways that are prideful or missing an opportunity to build a relationship.

True humility starts with a right perspective- looking to God. When we humble ourselves under God’s mighty hand, I think we can look at ourselves—and others—with God’s eyes and His heart. In some areas this means that we have to realize our brokenness but in other ways, we are treasured by God and loved by Him. The same is true with everyone around us. The superficial measures that we often use to judge others are not important to God. He sees our heart and when our heart is right before Him, He can lead us into right relationships with others bases on things that are real and true.

I think it is interesting that Peter adds to cast our anxiety on God. Humility and living in right relationship with one another is not easy! God is our source of strength and He can provide all that we need when we keep our focus on Him. 

What is God teaching you about humility?

New Year's Resolution

I have never been big on New Year's resolutions, but the start of January and a brand new year does present the opportunity to reflect on the previous year and look ahead with expectation and even a few goals.

As I was thinking back over 2012, one of the things that stuck out to me was the way I have seen my siblings dig deeper in their relationship with Jesus. They have impressed me and encouraged me, surprising me sometimes with the depth of their faith and in a sense, challenging me in the same way.

Based on that, I started to look at my own relationship with The Lord and was challenged to let Him be my sufficiency- and to learn and grow in my understanding of what that means for me this year. I can be stubborn and independent, hating to ask for help unless absolutely necessary. Yet, even though I like to depend only on myself, there is still a longing in my heart that is easy to fill with other things. Truthfully only God can fill that hole, putting joy there that can bubble up and spill over as I allow Him to work in my heart. One of the ways I have been growing in this area is by reading more Scripture, and asking God to give me an even greater hunger for His Truth. I don't want devotions to be just another check-mark on my "good things done" list, but rather one of the tools that God uses to teach and guide me. I have found so far that the more I read, the more I want to read. Sure, there are plenty of things that can distract from that time with God, but when I see it not just as a task but rather my lifeline, it becomes so much more important.

Did God challenge you with any New Year's resolutions? How are you growing in your relationship with Him?

The "One Another" Mission

Have you ever read through God’s Word looking for the “one another” commands? There are a bunch of them! Love one another, serve one another, accept one another, just to name a few. This tells me a couple of things. First, we are not meant to live the Christian life alone. God intends for us to grow in Him through community, through our interactions with other believers. Although by nature I am more of an introverted person and do not mind a quiet evening at home with a book (and much prefer this most of the time), I find that when I study God’s Word with other believers, pray with them, do life with them, that I see so many different aspects of God that I would miss by myself. Second, God gives specific commands for what our interactions are to look like. Our human nature does not lend itself to peaceful, perfect relationships, but we have the blue print for what these relationships should look like in Christ.

Here is an example to start with: John 13:34-35: “A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another. By this all men will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another”.

I saw something in these verses I hadn’t seen before. I normally focus on the “love one another” part, but that is not all. We are to love as Jesus loved us. So, we must ask ourselves, “How did Jesus love?”

Wow. Jesus lived out His love by dying in our place. There is a fullness in that love that is honestly beyond my understanding. It is undeserved. Jesus’ love gives me confidence because there is no fear in His love, yet it spurs me on to obedience as well. While Christ lived on earth, it was love that overflowed as He addressed the crowds, healed the sick, raised the dead, and even, I think, challenged the Pharisees. He wanted more for them than a life of legalism and tradition.

What a model for how I am to love others. I cannot love in the perfect way that Jesus did, and yet this is what I am commanded to seek to do. The only way I know to love others is to try to understand Jesus’ love for me, and to ask to be filled in the same way so that I can love others.

What are your thoughts? Add them in the comments and I would enjoy hearing what you have to say.

Check back in the weeks to come for more “one anothers”!

Time Machine

Sometimes I wish I had a time machine. I would go back and live those moments that were beautiful, special. I would go back to Christmas Eve 2012, singing out-of-tune Christmas carols with my family while looking at lights, dancing like crazy people to my brother's playlist, staying up late with my siblings as we talked from our hearts in the darkness. But life has gone on since then, and would I trade the moments God has given me today for a chance to relive moments in the past? They are memories, precious treasures. But we are not made to live in the past but to embrace today. God did not create the ability to go back in time, and he gives us the grace to be present today, to enjoy and celebrate, to endure hardship and to come out on the other end. He is the author of time. Ecclesiastes 3:1 There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under heaven.

Traditions, Old and New

I love the word 'tradition' when applied to the holidays. My family has so many fun traditions that we have kept up over the years, especially around Christmas. Some have even come from my own parents' childhood! A few of them have evolved through the years, but it is so wonderful to celebrate them as a family when we are all together.

This year was no exception! We also did a few new things this year that will surely stick around. Here are a few of the highlights!

1. Christmas Tree Decorating
My family always gets a real tree and decorates it together. I love pulling out ornaments and filling up the tree! Some people like to have a theme or just a few decorations perfectly placed, but I would much rather have our family's tree filled with memories.

My aunt and uncle started a tradition 16 years ago of giving my siblings and I a different ornament every year until we turn 18. Often our ornaments each year were similar, but were specifically suited to each one of us. Decorating the tree means pulling out our individual ornaments. Someday, we will be able to take our own ornaments and put them on our own tree.

2. Playing games
For many years my parents would give us a new family game for Christmas. My siblings and I took up the tradition and have been picking out a new game for all of us to play together each year. It is always fun to play different games throughout the Christmas break time. This year on the Saturday before Christmas, my siblings and I had a game marathon- playing a few rounds of a bunch of different games we hadn't played in awhile. Taboo at midnight combined with a lack of sleep sure makes for a lot of laughter!

3. Dance Parties, Pump up songs and Sign-making 
These would go under the category of new traditions. Christmas Eve we were in a jolly mood, and before going to bed we had an impromptu dance party! Throughout my time at home, my brother would select a song to get us pumped up for whatever we were about to do- be it shopping, eating dinner, playing a game or taking pictures. He had songs for every occasion.

My siblings also came up with the idea to make funny signs and use them in our picture-taking. They speak for themselves.

4. Christmas morning
After our annual sibling sleepover on Christmas Eve, we open our stockings as a family, enjoy a breakfast of little boxes of cereal and cran-apple juice, and then open presents. Although I enjoy all of these traditions (presents and candy are great), the best part is just being together as family. Especially knowing that I will be missing out on Christmas with my family for awhile after I leave for Cambodia, that time together is so sweet.

I will probably have to come up with some new traditions (or find a way to continue them Cambodian-style) but I am so thankful for a fun time with my family and our traditions, both old and new.

Lessons From the Farmer

When I am home I always enjoy going over to my grandpa Hilkemann’s for supper. He and my dad share a meal every Wednesday night, and my grandpa at 87 still cooks up some mashed potatoes and gravy, corn and chicken. It is always special to join them, and this week a coffee cup waited at my plate so he and I could enjoy an after dinner cup together, something we started just a couple of years ago.

My grandpa was part of the first generation of Hilkemanns born in the United States, and he didn’t get more than an 8^th grade education. He has never used a computer, gets frustrated with most modern conveniences, and lives a simple life.

But my grandpa is one of the smartest people I know. He can tell you what the weather will do simply by looking at the clouds and checking the direction the wind is coming from. He can diagnose livestock diseases, fix machinery, knows intuitively when to plant and when to harvest, and how to make a profit. He has had to use economics, physics, chemistry, biology, algebra, and geometry while lacking a degree in any of these. He still remembers the ebb and flow of droughts and good years, who owned what farm and what crop they put in.

My grandpa has modeled hard work, the kind where you put in long hours and get your hands dirty and finish the job. He has passed on those kinds of lessons to my dad, who has passed them down to us. My heritage is found in the soil of rural Nebraska, the many years and work invested in this place. While I have also inherited the Hilkemann bad back and knees, I treasure the model and lessons passed down to me by my grandpa Hilkemann. 

Reflections on Evil in the World

People are often quick to ask questions after a tragedy happens or natural disaster strikes. Where was God when this happened? Could a loving God allow this terrible thing to happen? Is this God's judgment?

I suppose these questions are natural. We want to have an answer, a reason for bad things. We want to know that there is something good that can come, and cling to that hope.

There are a few things I know, and these come from Scripture.

1. There is evil in the world. Sin entered the world and has affected all of mankind and creation itself. Without God's grace, we live according to our sinful nature.

Romans 8:5-8, 22 Those who live according to the sinful nature have their minds set on what nature desires; but those who live in accordance with the Spirit have their minds set on what the Spirit desires. The mind of the sinful man is death, but the mind controlled by the Spirit is life and peace; the sinful mind is hostile to God. It does not submit to God's law, nor can it do so. Those controlled by the sinful nature cannot please God. We know that the whole creation has been groaning as in the pains of childbirth right up to the present time.

2. God WILL bring justice for the evil that is committed.

Psalm 9:7-8 The Lord reigns forever; he has established his throne for judgment. He will judge the world in righteousness; he will govern the peoples with justice.

3. God is sovereign and His ways are higher than our ways.

Isaiah 55:8-9 "For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways", declares The Lord. "As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways."

4. God has our days numbered and He created us with a purpose. I don't understand why some people get 90 years- worth of days, others only 6 years-worth.

Psalm 139:15-16 My frame was not hidden from you when I was made in the secret place. When I was woven together in the depths of the earth, your eyes saw my unformed body. All the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be.

5. How we fight against evil- loving those around us, shining light into dark places.

1 Peter 2:9-10 But you are a chosen people, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, a people belonging to God, that you may declare the praises of him who called you out of darkness into his wonderful light. Once you were not a people, but now you are the people of God; once you had not received mercy, but now you have received mercy.

1 John 4:10-11 This is love: not that we loved God, but that he loved us and sent his Son as an atoning sacrifice for our sins. Dear friends, since God so loved us, we also ought to love one another.

I do not have answers exactly to why bad things happen. Yet I have to trust God- He doesn't change and He has shown us through the Word that He is faithful.  

Hidden

I'm not gonna lie, I like a good pat on the back, “Awesome job, Sarah”, or even a simple “Thanks!”. I can serve unseen, un-thanked for awhile, and then I start to get jealous of others’ recognition or success. My sisters used to tease me for being the “suffering servant”, making sure everyone knew that I was dealing with some hardship for the sake of others (and even wanting a pat on the back for that too).

We all want to be needed, wanted, recognized.

I read Colossians 3 in a new way this morning and it has given me a different perspective, one I am still wrestling to wrap my mind around.  

Colossians 3:1-4: Since you have been raised to new life with Christ, set your sights on the realities of heaven, where Christ sits in the place of honor at God’s right hand. Think about the things of heaven, not the things of earth. For you died to this life, and your real life is hidden with Christ in God. And when Christ, who is your life, is revealed to the whole world, you will share in all his glory.

  

Our life is now hidden. This is the opposite of what I want! I want to be recognized for my success. But see, when we follow Jesus it isn’t about us anymore. When people look at us, they should see Jesus because we are hidden in Him. It is about His glory, and we have put aside the earthly measures of success. Paul goes on in the rest of the chapter to give a picture of what it means to be hidden in Christ. The sinful nature is cast aside and all of the practices of the old self must be eliminated, burned, gone. Instead, we should be known for our compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience. We should look like Jesus! Our reward is not on earth, but rather in heaven when Christ is revealed to the whole world. Every conversation is a chance to extend grace.

I have a long ways to go! But today I am looking up, to the things of Christ and not on earthly things as I seek to hide myself more in Him. 

 

"In the Scriptures, the great miracle of the incarnation slips into the ordinary life of a child; the great miracle of the transfiguration fades into the demon-possessed valley below; the glory of the resurrection descends into a breakfast on the seashore. This is not an anticlimax, but a great revelation of God. We have a tendency to look for wonder in our experience, and we mistake heroic actions for real heroes. It's one thing to go through a crisis grandly, yet quite another to go through every day glorifying God when there is no witness, no limelight, and no one paying even the remotest attention to us. If we are not looking for halos, we at least want something that will make people say, 'What a wonderful man of prayer he is!' or 'What a great woman of devotion she is!' If you are properly devoted to the Lord Jesus, you have reached the loft height where no one would ever notice you personally. All that is noticed is the power of God coming through you all the time.”

~Oswald Chambers

Where is the Joy?

This weekend I was in Wal-mart, and talk about a crazy place! People were everywhere, lines were long and patience was running thin. As I waited to check out, I observed a lady chewing out the cashier, not trusting the total he said she owed. The lady behind me in line was sighing over the long wait, and the lady behind her was complaining about the others who were complaining. I have heard comments from people who have not put up decorations or shopped for presents yet. “I guess I am a ‘Scrooge’ this year” they have said.

Where is the joy? Is Christmas just about Santa Clause, presents, holiday traditions, carols and family time? There is nothing wrong with those things, but they sure don’t seem to be making people very happy.

Perhaps we need to take a lesson from Mary.

Luke 1:46-55 And Mary said, “My soul glorifies the Lord and my Spirit rejoices in God my Savior, for he has been mindful of the humble state of his servant. From now on all generations will call me blessed, for the Mighty One has done great things for me- holy is name. His mercy extends to those who fear him, from generation to generation. He has performed mighty deeds with his arm; he has scattered those who are proud in their inmost thoughts. He has brought down rulers from their thrones but has lifted up the humble. He has filled the hungry with good things but has sent the rich away empty. He has helped his servant Israel, remembering to be merciful to Abraham and his descendents forever, even as he said to our fathers”.

Mary had learned of a pretty major change in her life! She was going to have a baby, and not just any baby. She had every right to give into fear or worry or anger, and yet she praised God. She rejoiced in who God is, His character and the ways He had worked in the past.

Perhaps as you prepare for Christmas your life doesn’t seem real rosy. There might be any number of reasons why- related to the holiday or not. Our joy is not found in a season or holiday, but rather in trusting the Mighty One who has done great things for us. Instead of focusing on the stresses or struggles, let’s commit together to focus on what we can praise God for and celebrate His goodness.